Confession #15

You know what pissed me off the whole day today? It’s the fact that our college department is so full of bullshit and nonsense. I didn’t went to school today to practice for that goddamn parade for tomorrow’s intramurals. Why is it such a big deal anyway? Well for some it may be, but for me, FUCK? I don’t care about such shit like that. So anyway, that’s not the whole point. The point is that, my college department SBO leaders are trying to make a clown out of each and every one of us. At first, they are trying to make us wear skimpy maong shorts and I am never okay with that!

I admit, I wasn’t blessed with perfect legs for me to boast. That’s one of the reasons why I never wore a pair of shorts when I go out to hang out with friends or strolling around the mall with my family. I don’t even like wearing them unless some really important event requires me to and my really close friends are with me. The upcoming intramurals is not a really important event for me and my close friends are not with me so wearing shorts just for that parade is fucking embarrassing! I don’t want to be more embarrassed than I already am with my own legs.

I went crazy when my college friend informed me about it. “Where the fuck will I find a pair of maong shorts for tomorrow’s event”, exactly the words that were running in my mind this afternoon. 

But then, she sent me a text message saying that they’re okay with pants. We can wear pants tomorrow and that was such a relief for me but that doesn’t changes the way I think about the so-called leaders in our college department. The dean is a big bitch, no wonder the student leaders are suck up freaks.

But anyway, whatever. At least my problem right now is solved. I heard they added a lot of steps for tomorrow’s presentation. It was a contest daw. Fuck them. I don’t really care about tomorrow’s parade or shitty presentation. What I just care about is that after all these shit, I am seriously going to look for a place that’s worth my time and that gives me the kind of quality of education that I need, deserve and want LOL.

Confession #14

I just have to post something about MATH. Seriously, I have been dealing with that ever since God knows when and I just can’t figure out why, until now, it’s still my NUMBER ONE ENEMY. Seriously, aren’t we both tired of trying to put down each other? LOL. But come to think of it, what are these algorithms, algebraic expressions, X and Y shit, used for anyway? I mean, they only get useful when your actual job would be Math teacher. That’s it.

Forgive me if I’m so negative about Math. I just don’t feel like it. I just don’t like the fucking subject. There. I said it. It’s stupid. It’s brain-draining. No matter how hard I try to follow the steps the teacher provides, no matter how hard I try to analyze and learn from the examples the teacher also provides, never in my life did I received a final grade of 90 plus. I didn’t even received a grade higher than 80 something even if it was an exam or a quiz.

My Math exam papers are worse. It’s like a bloody sheet of sanitary napkins or something. Oh dear Lord. Why can’t Math and I be friends? Maybe it’s because of my laziness and lack of persistence with the subject too but other than that, WHY? I have tried to give much focus it deserves but I just couldn’t make it. I know it’s not impossible.

Confession #13

I just have to say something about how my mother nags non-stop. Seriously, I love you ma. Really. I mean, there’s no one in the world that could do the things that you do but sometimes you bring out the monster inside me! Ever since yesterday, she had been endlessly ranting about how lazy I am with cleaning my room, with taking care of my little siblings and I have had enough of it! SERIOUSLY!

And even until I got home from attending a salu-salo for the eighteenth birthday of a high school classmate of mine, she still continues doing it! It’s pissing me off already! She doesn’t even take the time to appreciate the things that I have been doing for her! GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

But I have been trying to act cool ever since this morning but a while ago, I just have to speak up but not in a really rude way! Well I can’t put all the blame on her though. At some point, this is also my fault because I have been really lazy, as usual but I’m trying my hardest to get that ugly habit out of my system but she doesn’t realize it! 

Ma, I really love you so much. Really. There’s no other person that could ever take your place but please, minimize the nagging? I am really trying to get out of my lazy old self and I can’t be successful in doing that if you keep on nagging and nagging. Could you just notice the little things, the little improvements I am doing and actually appreciate it? Please?  

Confession #12

I feel bad about being absent for the past two days. But as much as I wanted to go to school, my whole body system just couldn’t take the asthma attacks I have been dealing with for the past days. Right now, I am worried about a lot school-related shiz. Tomorrow I need to go to school even if I’ll be attacked with my asthma again. I have to pay my miscellaneous fees (because even if I am an academic scholar, there are still a few things that I need to pay for) and to do that damned P.E activity.

Why do we even need to perform that aero kickboxing shit anyway? I mean, couldn’t we just do a few push-ups and curl-ups and be fine with that? Shit. Now I have to research that aero kickboxing thing and I have to memorize each step so I could teach it to my other group mates. I should have gone to school today. Fuck this. 

But anyway, there’s nothing else I could do right now but to memorize those stupid aero kickboxing steps, get the hell on with it tomorrow, pay my fees and review my lessons. Fuck. It’s already the midterm exams. I have to seriously work my ass off already. If I get good grades this time, my parents will be impressed and will hopefully grant my wish to transfer to a better institution with strict ways of teaching. Seriously, I want to be more challenged than this. LOL. 

Confession #11

I miss doing this! Anyway, the reason why I posted another confession entry is that I just want to share with you guys a random fact about me HAHAHA :D. Well if you guys think this is quite boring then you’re free to scroll down your tumblr dashboard but nothing and no one’s stopping me from posting this! ;D

One fact about me is that I am never comfortable typing something or writing when I’m sitting on a stool. Stool didn’t meant a human waste but a thing used for sitting! HAHA :D. Why am I not comfortable with it? If I spend an hour or more sitting on it, there’s a great tendency that my backbone would hurt big time. 

So that’s it for now! Hahaha :) Anyway, what’s for merienda?

Confession #10

I receive text messages from my some of my high school barkada who are studying in different schools saying they hate their subjects so much to the point that every text message they send is full of any kind of cuss you could think of and there are even cross breeds too (like p*ta plus shet equals p*tashet). And you know what subjects they’re ranting about? The subjects that I so wanted to learn and they are Philosophy and History. 

Oh sweet baby Jesus. If I was in their classes, even if the teacher is so damn fucking boring, I would always be so freakin’ excited and giddy to attend the class. I could imagine myself researching all night for additional information so I could actively participate in class. I have always loved Philosophy and History. It’s like a big brain challenge to me aside from Math. 

Right now, can I just replace my English subjects with all those awesome stuff? I mean, I only get to learn them when I reach third year or fourth year already and that’s still years and years away! And I’m not even certain if I’ll still be staying in that school. I mean, I have other plans in my life. I just hope God would allow me to do it. *sigh* Can I just replace Math and English with Philosophy and History? I would really be super giddy and excited to go to school everyday! :D